How long has it been, i asked myself. Period wasn't short, neither did the first time it kicked of till now has been too long a time. All the while, emotions & feelings were vital to me in the process where i was the only worker. Sometimes you just gotta face it, most things in our life just don't go the way we wanted & hoped for.
I still remember the first time where all has began. Through the travel of time, things has changed & evloved. Has the changes become better? Or it just make you realise you just gotta stop your steps & end your lone journey. Somehow or so, deep down in the heart, I just knew the day would come & I will just have to stop my foot.
In my lone journey, gates & guards were my first barrier from entering. It was tough at first, but eventually, I did pass the gates with a little help from my perserverance. I thought things did happen to go my way as I managed to set my foot on the pavement but somehow people gave me a piece of advise "though you launch your foot onto the pavement, is your destination in view?". This question did came to me & i have to admit, no view in sight of any destination & i might not even know whether i will make it there.
I always believe in sincerity & perseverance, so I gave in my heart in seek for answers to the destination I desire to reach. I gave patience, passion & accepted critism and to build myself stronger & ensuring that I adapt to the enviroment. Many obstacles do came along, some I manage to overcome them. But sad to say, I only manage to overcome them, but did not understand the meaning behind the obstacles.
Up to this moment today on the 30th of DEC 2010, I finally realise the pavement wasn't meant for me to start off my journey. Sometimes, no matter how hard you tried, the destination is just not fated for you. My heart really hurts. But the longer if I continue to move, I will just find myself not even close to the any destination. In fact, there might not be any destination afterall. The gate master once said to me, "I can't stop you from deciding to start your journey, but I can't gurantee any results & the pavement might not be suitable for you".
From this moment, I have to end my lone journey. I have given my passion & heart into it, but the enviroment just wouldn't accept my existance. I guess I just wasn't good enough.
Yes! sincerity and perseverance :)
ReplyDeleteHowever, i guess many a times, must put yr sincerity and perseverance on the right things or on the right person.. or else the person to be tired or eventually will be hurt is u..
Sometimes, 不要强求, 顺其自然或许会比较好..
如果是你的,终究会是你 ..
No one is ever perfect, so just try to be the best out of yourself :) if you think u aren't gd enough, why? Probably, jot down and be a better person out from it! Love yourself, friends or love ones will accept of who u r! :)